As Rune Heartripper so colourfully put it at the post-match interview: "Those *censored* bastards *censored* *censored* spiked our *censored* water. It's *censored* unbelievable that those *censored* goat-loving*censored* are allowed to *censored* bribe the ref and *censored* hex our players and *censored* tie our *censored* shoelaces. Who the *censored* *censored* *censored* *censored* and I'm just getting started you *censored* *censored* *censored* *censored* *censored* *censored* *censored* *censored*. Next time I'll *censored* rip their *censored* bodies into *censored* bits of *censored* *censored* stuff. Why can't you *censored* officials get this *censored* right instead of *censored* up the *censored* game. And *censored* *censored* my grandmother *censored* *censored* a hard iron rod *censored* into your *censored* eyesocket. You *censored* *censored* *censored*."
After this it get's pretty unintelligible.
søndag den 30. marts 2008
søndag den 23. marts 2008
Low Riders 15/3 - 08
It all started well for the Buccaneers, scoring a TD and injuring a dwarf but then the fun stopped.
The injured dwarf wasn't really injured, just needed a bit of the Bugman's Brew to get going again, and so did the rest of his team-mates.
Half an hour later Slaughter Bay had half their team left, trailing the dwarves 2-1. This was also the final score, as the Buccaneers didn't push much to get a 2nd TD with 6 men left on the field.
After the game Buccaneers coach, Rune Heartripper, called for a more focused effort to ban doping (most often in the form of strong dwarven ale) from Blood Bowl. Many reporters listening to the mad ravings of Heartripper told a tale of excessive whining, bordering on the extreme. Heartripper however, claims that he's never whined once in his entire life and that this misconception has started because he was once attacked and bitten in the throat by a slavering monster, and that has left his voice damaged and sounding slightly...thin. Most would call it whiny.
The injured dwarf wasn't really injured, just needed a bit of the Bugman's Brew to get going again, and so did the rest of his team-mates.
Half an hour later Slaughter Bay had half their team left, trailing the dwarves 2-1. This was also the final score, as the Buccaneers didn't push much to get a 2nd TD with 6 men left on the field.
After the game Buccaneers coach, Rune Heartripper, called for a more focused effort to ban doping (most often in the form of strong dwarven ale) from Blood Bowl. Many reporters listening to the mad ravings of Heartripper told a tale of excessive whining, bordering on the extreme. Heartripper however, claims that he's never whined once in his entire life and that this misconception has started because he was once attacked and bitten in the throat by a slavering monster, and that has left his voice damaged and sounding slightly...thin. Most would call it whiny.
Miskatonic Mischief United 15/3-08
On an eerie night in the glow of the full moon, we played the living dead and walked to tell the tale.
A great game with loads of turnovers, cliffhangers and an interception saw both teams leave the field with a single point. The score ended 1-1 and according to both sets of fans that was an unfair result for their respective teams.
A great game with loads of turnovers, cliffhangers and an interception saw both teams leave the field with a single point. The score ended 1-1 and according to both sets of fans that was an unfair result for their respective teams.
lørdag den 8. marts 2008
Daddy's Hardhitters 8/3-08
With a historic low attendance, even though many snotlings on the Hardhitters team had brought their families for a fun outing and a hope of watching their closest kin being smashed to green pudding, the crowd had already deemed this match a dud.
The two teams had something else in mind though.
The kick-off went far into Hardhitters pitch giving one of the snotlings (come on, you can't expect me to tell a difference between those green spots) ample time to get in position to catch the ball. And catch it he didn't as he was too busy hurling abusive slang at the buccaneers. Soon both teams were taking shots at eachothers questionable origins. The ref was slow in acting, but his chainsaw made enough of an impression for the two teams to settle down and get on with the ball playing. The four ogres didn't have their eyes on the ball though and soon had a major brawl going on the line of scrimmage.
The Slaughter Bay boys was not scared so easily and happily went into the ruffle, head or feet first.
Blood bath followed. Not much attention was given to the ball and the score at half-time reflected this. 0-0.
The Buccaneers started the second half on an offensive. The Hardhitters apparently didn't expect this and soon they were one ogre down and were hard pushed to get at the Buccaneers player, Deth Methell, sprinting for their end zone. The snotlings weren't going to take this though and a green tide swept over the hapless Deth. The ball somehow ended up in the crowd and an avid fan (a family member of one of the snotlings, I bet) threw it onto the pitch again. Another quick-witted snotling stormed off after the ball, snatched it up and zig-zagged down the pitch, into the spiked fist of the onrushing Rayor Throatslitter. Reeker Badbreath, The Goblin Buccaneer was quick to snatch up the fumbled ball, but contrary to his coach and team mates' constant pleading to pass the ball downfield for players better placed for a touchdown, he decided to keep the ball for himself. A wise decision that turned out to be, as Reeker a few minutes later was moonwalking into the Touchdown Zone. Contrary to Reeker's beliefs that he did it all by himself, the sacrifices made by the other Buccaneers players to get him down field and safe, must have been a joy to watch for the Buccaneers coach. That was team play, by everyone except the one with the ball.
With both teams decimated by the violent war waging in the middle of the pitch, the last minutes of the game ticked by without any game-changing incidents. Slaughter Bay Buccaneers won a beautiful game 1-0 on a beautiful day.
The two teams had something else in mind though.
The kick-off went far into Hardhitters pitch giving one of the snotlings (come on, you can't expect me to tell a difference between those green spots) ample time to get in position to catch the ball. And catch it he didn't as he was too busy hurling abusive slang at the buccaneers. Soon both teams were taking shots at eachothers questionable origins. The ref was slow in acting, but his chainsaw made enough of an impression for the two teams to settle down and get on with the ball playing. The four ogres didn't have their eyes on the ball though and soon had a major brawl going on the line of scrimmage.
The Slaughter Bay boys was not scared so easily and happily went into the ruffle, head or feet first.
Blood bath followed. Not much attention was given to the ball and the score at half-time reflected this. 0-0.
The Buccaneers started the second half on an offensive. The Hardhitters apparently didn't expect this and soon they were one ogre down and were hard pushed to get at the Buccaneers player, Deth Methell, sprinting for their end zone. The snotlings weren't going to take this though and a green tide swept over the hapless Deth. The ball somehow ended up in the crowd and an avid fan (a family member of one of the snotlings, I bet) threw it onto the pitch again. Another quick-witted snotling stormed off after the ball, snatched it up and zig-zagged down the pitch, into the spiked fist of the onrushing Rayor Throatslitter. Reeker Badbreath, The Goblin Buccaneer was quick to snatch up the fumbled ball, but contrary to his coach and team mates' constant pleading to pass the ball downfield for players better placed for a touchdown, he decided to keep the ball for himself. A wise decision that turned out to be, as Reeker a few minutes later was moonwalking into the Touchdown Zone. Contrary to Reeker's beliefs that he did it all by himself, the sacrifices made by the other Buccaneers players to get him down field and safe, must have been a joy to watch for the Buccaneers coach. That was team play, by everyone except the one with the ball.
With both teams decimated by the violent war waging in the middle of the pitch, the last minutes of the game ticked by without any game-changing incidents. Slaughter Bay Buccaneers won a beautiful game 1-0 on a beautiful day.
Necro Suprimus 8/3 -08
After a hard fought first half where the pouring rain made for a very sporadic, yet strangely entertaining game, the Necro's didn't turn up for second half. Many rumours have been circulating about this event, though many of the fans closest to the Necro's locker room tell of strange tearing sounds and a lot of howling followed by bones scattering on the tiled floor and then, the sound of padded feet and barking in the distance....No one knows excactly what happened, but Slaughter Bay was handed the win. 2-0.
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